***
An alpha and omega in this state could be said to be completely lacking in reason.
The task the heavens bestowed them with was to bond and bear children, producing outstanding later generations.
Xiao He finally didn’t have to endure anymore, and Fan Shen no longer had any misgivings.
In the narrow aircraft, the confined space was constantly shaking.
But neither of them could wait anymore. They couldn’t wait to get home and get into bed. They couldn’t even wait one more second.
Without the need for any foreplay, they started with the fiercest of poundings.
Xiao He had never felt so much pleasure before, such pleasure it seemed his body and mind couldn’t take it.
He could only hold on to Fan Shen, telling him all of his emotions, his bone-deep love, devoted infatuation and the feelings he couldn’t let go of.
He hadn’t even met him in reality, but it was as if they’d experienced several lives together.
They’d been together for decades, and from first meeting each other to getting to know each other, staying together and loving each other, the process had never been smooth. Or he should say that the road was rough, and they went through many trials.
But they’d gotten through all of it, gotten to today, arrived at this moment, where all Xiao He had to do was hold Fan Shen to forget all of the suffering, only sweetness left in his heart.
He really loved him, loved him so much he could never have imagined it in all his life.
No...not only one life. Xiao He felt that when he met Fan Shen, he’d thrown all the feelings from several lives into this one person, in this one life.
Xiao He held him, and while constantly drowning in pleasure, he couldn’t stop himself from feeling some worry and disappointment… If Fan Shen wasn’t willing to wake up, would they...still have a future?
If they didn’t have a future, what would he do...what could he do?
Disappointment turned to despair, and that stabbing pain made Xiao He unwilling to touch it. He could only wrap his legs around Fan Shen, sinking desperately into an ocean of pleasure.
Xiao He couldn’t tell how long they continued in the end.
But by the end, Xiao He knew that Fan Shen had woken up.
The real Fan Shen had woken up.
This absurd world had come to a stop.
Xiao He was a little afraid. He was afraid that Fan Shen would push him away again, make him leave, make him stop and give up.
This trace of anxiety made it so that Xiao He refused to let go of Fan Shen. He’d already been successfully marked and gotten through this difficult period, but he still wrapped himself around Fan Shen.
If he could enjoy it for a moment longer then he would. Xiao He knew he was avoiding reality, but he didn’t want to face it.
It was because he simply couldn’t understand, couldn’t figure out what Fan Shen was worried over.
And with him like this, Fan Shen couldn’t refuse him.
Whether it was the mental fragment or the main will, neither could push him away or fail to satisfy him.
Xiao He was sure of Fan Shen’s mind, so he refused to stop.
But when all was said and done, Fan Shen really did love him.
The main will remembered everything. After going through so much with him, the feelings he invested could only be more than Xiao He’s, not less.
He knew what Xiao He was thinking, but he couldn’t give him what he wanted.
Waking up was simple, but what awaited him after waking up was only endless loss.
So even if Fan Shen knew that Xiao He was escaping reality, he was still willing to escape with him.
Just enjoying this moment was good enough.
But no matter how beautiful something was, there was always a time for it to end.
Fan Shen was fine, but he had to worry about Xiao He.
Xiao He’s current mental strength wasn’t enough to bear such intense stimulation and excitement.
This wouldn’t harm him physically, but it would exhaust and wear down his mind.
In the end, Fan Shen deliberately guided Xiao He into falling asleep.
But even asleep, Xiao He couldn’t bear to let go of Fan Shen. He had a feeling that if he closed his eyes, Fan Shen would leave him, and once he woke up, he’d never be able to find him again.
Such a great feeling of loss surrounded Xiao He that he slept restlessly. He slept for a long time, but when he opened his eyes, they were filled with panic.
When Fan Shen saw this, his heart ached. He dropped a kiss on Xiao He’s forehead and comforted him in a low, rough voice. “Don’t worry, I’m here.”
Xiao He was startled. He knew this was Fan Shen, but he didn’t dare to say anything else.
After a slight pause, Xiao He couldn’t help but lift his head and look up into his eyes. “Fan Shen…”
“Yes…” Fan Shen replied to him softly.
“I…” A heap of words rushed to his mouth, and Xiao He almost said them, but he shrank back at the last moment. His eyelashes trembled faintly, and he said softly, “I...still want it.”
Rather than saying something and getting hurt, it was better to enjoy himself for another round.
Fan Shen looked down at him, a tolerant smile in his black eyes. “Aren’t you tired?”
“No!” Xiao He quickly replied. “I’m not tired!”
Fan Shen lightly touched his moist lips. “Be good, you have to rest for a while.”
He was so gentle that Xiao He felt intensely uneasy.
It was just like the calm before the storm, or like an adult coaxing a child before he left.
He seemed gentle and mild on the surface, but what followed was the attack of the gale, and the man turning and leaving abruptly.
Xiao He’s eyes revealed the worry he couldn’t conceal. Fan Shen felt bad for him, and couldn’t help but say softly, “One more time, and after that you have to rest.”
Xiao He’s heart felt empty, but he was unwilling to let go of him. He nodded hard and wrapped his arms around the other man’s neck, a little helpless and a little uneasy.
But his heart soon brimmed over with the pleasure Fan Shen gave him.
When he thought about it carefully, this feeling wasn’t right.
He knew that the precipice of despair was before him, so he wildly indulged at this moment.
He knew that they would soon be separated for real, so he desperately intertwined with him to the last second.
The more he thought about it the more empty his heart grew, and the more it fell into turmoil. In the end, Xiao He couldn’t hold back anymore, and at the moment when Fan Shen brought him to his climax, he said the words that he’d pressed down in the depths of his heart. “Fan Shen, don’t abandon me, don’t leave me...”
Fan Shen’s movements abruptly paused, but he soon sped up again. When he finally released, he pressed against Xiao He’s lips, giving him a kiss full of passion, affection and unspoken sorrow, but didn’t reply to what he said.
On one hand, Xiao He’s body was completely satisfied, but on the other, his heart sank to an all-time low.
With such a sharp contrast, he finally couldn’t bear it anymore.
“Why...tell me why, please?”
Fan Shen looked at him, wiped away Xiao He’s tears with his fingers and then gathered him into his arms, hugging him so hard it seemed he wanted to merge him into his marrow. Then he said lowly, “If I could, I would really want to trap you here forever, so that you could stay deeply asleep with me...but I can’t be that selfish.”
Xiao He trembled slightly.
Fan Shen caressed his back, his voice so soft it was like a faint gust of wind.
“I don’t want to wake up, Xiao He. Once I wake up, I’m destined to lose you.”
Even in his embrace, Xiao He still felt as cold as ice. He couldn’t help but huddle closer to him and whisper, “Why? You love me, and I love you, so why is it that after waking up…”
“I’ve had enough, Xiao He, I’ve really had enough. Being able to hear what other people are thinking at heart is something that would drive anyone mad.”
***
The author has something to say:
The greatest secret in the whole book is revealed at this moment~
Our gong can hear other people’s thoughts. Whether he wants to or not, he can hear it all; whether it’s good, bad or accidental, he can hear it all.
Muah, this was how I planned it out at the beginning, and events followed as a matter of course. I could drag it out for a few more worlds, but that’d be a bit of a cheat, so there’s no need! Stopping at the most beautiful moment when everyone loves each other~ How wonderful!
Of course, the follow-up still has to resolve Fan Shen’s fundamental problem, and we still have to have a sweet HE~
***
banoffee: 1 hour and 48 minutes for 1,574 words, or 6.9 minutes for every 100 words. A decrease in rate by 0.6 minutes!
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Wuwuwuwu i didnt realize we were so close to the ending already
ReplyDeleteFan Shen, my friend, you've really been hurt by the world. 😭😭😭
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